Mothers don't
deserve Mother's Day. What can a day, a year or even a decade of accolades do
for mothers who deserve a lifetime award for their contribution to humanity?
Mother's Day is
a commercially sponsored event. What it suggests is that mothers need flowers,
cards, special attention, praise and breakfast in bed, only on that one given
day of the year. End of mother's day, take mother back to her seniors home and
forget about her till the weekend.
This is not the
way we deal with mothers in my community. We
believe Heaven lies at the feet of a mother and we make sure we treat mothers
with respect, love and care - always and forever. So I am using this Mother's
Day to make a point of my own ‑ about mothers everywhere.
Mothers are
unique, special and irreplaceable. It's
only when I lost my mother that I realized what a vacuum there is my life.
No one can take her place; no matter how old I become, a special part of
my heart and my soul that will always yearn for my mother. She was the only
person who rejoiced in my achievements; a person with whom I could fight yet
feel that I was still loved; a person who loved me irrespective of my faults and
the only person I could go to with my own needs. Now that I am a mother myself, I understand the impact and
role of a mother in the lifetime of a person. I believe that a mother's
influence is necessary for a well‑rounded personality to develop in a
child. The unfortunate among us who
deny the gracious presence of a mother or knowingly reject it,
are truly bereft
of blessing.
Those who are
already mothers will empathize with what I am saying. Those who plan to enter the sublime state of motherhood in the future,
may wish to reflect that planning to become a mother is an obligation which
comes with a great deal of accountability. It is not just a whim or a passing
phase. With becoming a mother,
comes a sense of responsibility that cannot be shared or shirked. A mother has to play a multitude of roles and give all of
herself. Sometimes, a woman ends up being mother not only to her own children,
but to everyone around her as well. This
is the unique aura of warmth, love and care that a mother emanates. I suppose it is this bond that allows women to bear the pain of
childbirth, stay awake nights and tend to their children despite their own
needs. Selflessness is another name
for motherhood.
When my sons
ask me the perennial question "How did you know that I did that?", or
"how come you hear me coughing at 2 a.m.?" my answer satisfies them.
I tell them that they are a part of me because they were born from my
body and there is an invisible cord that they cannot see, which binds us. They actually believe this because they know that their pain is my pain,
their happiness is my joy and sometimes I reach out to them before they have
even thought that they need a hug. What other relationship is there in life that
can boast of bonds as strong of these?
When I hear
talk about feminists, liberation and equality among the sexes, I feel that there
can be nothing more feminine than becoming a mother; there is nothing more
liberating than being a mother and if being equal to men means having to give up
motherhood, then no thank you. The joys and pleasures of being a mother far
outweighs the battle of the sexes.
Since Mother's
Day is a North American custom, I would like to take this opportunity to pay
tribute to mothers everywhere. This
is a tribute to the mother I see carrying her sleepy, struggling child to the
babysitter at 7 a.m. every morning on the bus; to the mother whose children are far away; to mothers who have recently
lost children; to single mothers trying to juggle a career and home; to mothers
who embrace their sons as they send them off to war; to mothers in Iraq, Israel
and Palestine who have seen their children slaughtered in front of their eyes;
to mothers in Rwanda who starve themselves so that their children can have a
piece of bread and to mothers who are here to share and care.
To all these
mothers, Happy Mothers Day for yesterday, today and for all our days to come.
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